can we get nightvision for the apartment?
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
