You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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