At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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