That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
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