Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Randomize
