You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I touched a dick in church today
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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