I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
