sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Damn victory sex feels great
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
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