so that wasnt chicken after all
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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