she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
