i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
