i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Princesses don't give blow jobs
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
