were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
