just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize