I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
