I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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