Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
this hospital has no fireball
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
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