did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
