We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
