Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Randomize