nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
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