Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
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Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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