I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize