He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
