omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
