Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
