i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades