why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
