Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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