i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
