I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I deserve this hangover.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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