I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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