you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
honey bunches of taint.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize