It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
