Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
