Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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