I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
