i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize