I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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