In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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