The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
