How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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