Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Randomize
