what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
