I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Congratulations! We have a period
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