Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
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