I think I just saw someone hide a body.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
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It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
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After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.