How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
