Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.

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(902): I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out. http://tfl.nu/3h1q

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(317): View more from Indiana

she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"

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(317): she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES" http://tfl.nu/88gh

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(802): View more from Vermont

the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME

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(802): the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME http://tfl.nu/i706

Replies (51) Good night (750) Bad night (6999)
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(513): View more from Ohio

both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage

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(513): both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage http://tfl.nu/uqc7

Replies (22) Good night (1888) Bad night (7418)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him

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(412): He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him http://tfl.nu/4xvd

Replies (13) Good night (4127) Bad night (959)
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(519): View more from Ontario

Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.

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(519): Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife. http://tfl.nu/uqm2

Replies (13) Good night (1564) Bad night (5404)
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(727): View more from Florida

And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity

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(727): And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity http://tfl.nu/9e9v

Replies (9) Good night (2414) Bad night (875)
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(619): View more from California

I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw

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(619): I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw http://tfl.nu/yk6h

Replies (11) Good night (999) Bad night (1990)
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(270): View more from Kentucky

So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing

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(270): So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing http://tfl.nu/i92f

Replies (5) Good night (1621) Bad night (748)
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(213): View more from California

My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."

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(213): My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie." http://tfl.nu/jevy

Replies (38) Good night (3810) Bad night (871)
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(218): View more from Minnesota

No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.

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(218): No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating. http://tfl.nu/5a1l

Replies (10) Good night (2601) Bad night (733)
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(224): View more from Illinois

We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.

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(224): We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods. http://tfl.nu/n3ep

Replies (3) Good night (1956) Bad night (552)
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(503): View more from Oregon

How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?

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(503): How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor? http://tfl.nu/eg7j

Replies (6) Good night (1421) Bad night (1079)
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(770): View more from Georgia

He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.

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(770): He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits. http://tfl.nu/4emx

Replies (11) Good night (646) Bad night (2065)
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(740): View more from Ohio

I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.

(1-740): View more from Ohio

Are you at a park?

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(740): I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS. (1-740): Are you at a park? http://tfl.nu/nmnn

Replies (2) Good night (713) Bad night (301)

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