I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Buhtt sex?
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize
